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Monday, May 22, 2017

Becoming Your Own Best Friend


I've been sitting here wondering what my blog post would be about. I kept brainstorming ideas, but couldn't settle on one topic. Deep down, I realized, I already knew what the subject matter was. This post is about trusting others while becoming your own best friend. 

I am learning and growing each and every day. Over the past few months, I've been noticing a pattern surrounding trust. I'm a very trusting person, an open book. When it comes down to it though, there's a handful of people that I know I can depend on. I've come to see that some of the people I have placed my trust in, have caused me harm, shown their true colors and not been the person I thought them to be. And that's ok! Every experience, is just that...an experience! I choose to turn the negative into a positive.  


One of my favorite memoirs, is The Woman I Wanted To Be by Diane Von Furstenberg.
A quote that I love from the book, "The most important relationship in your life is the relationship you have with yourself. Because no matter what happens, you will always be with yourself." After, I completed reading this memoir, I felt a sense of empowerment. The essence of this quote, has guided me as I have sought to obtain something positive from my experiences (friends who have betrayed my trust). The message that came through, is that it is important to be your own best friend. 



How to become your own best friend!

It starts with love, compassion and respect. 

1. We are our harshest critic. Generally, we are harder on ourself than on someone else. When we engage in negative self talk, it's as if we are setting ourselves up to fail. 
Practice loving yourself more. One great way to do this, is to do a mirror exercise. Anyone can do this. There is not a limit to the amount of self love one can give. 

Stand in front of a mirror. Get close to it. Look into your eyes. Really stare at yourself. Acknowledge what you love about yourself. 
Say a positive mantra such as, "I love myself exactly as I am in this moment."
You might be tempted to just spew negativity about your appearance, but keep at this exercise. In time, you may become more comfortable with it. You may actually enjoy doing it and start seeing yourself in a more favorable light. 

2. Make a list of qualities you would want in a best friend. 

Example:
  • Someone who accepts me as I am 
  • A good listener
  • Balanced
  • Optimistic


Next, see how you can give this to yourself. As you work on your own relationship, it sets the tone for the people you allow into your life and how they treat you. 

3. Embark on a journey of self discovery (This might be an opportunity to journal)! 

Ask yourself who you are? Are there things in your life you want to change? 

What are you core values?

Do you have unfulfilled desires? 

What is holding you back? What are you fearful of?

Remove the self doubt that is holding you back. 
Allow yourself to grow by letting go of what is not serving you. 

4. Trust your intuition 

Listen to that voice within. You have this GPS inside, ready to guide you!


As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

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Until next time,


XOXOTheZenFashionista

25 comments:

  1. As a health coach for teens, this is one of the topics I cover all the time. I am still a work in progress myself, but I am so much kinder to myself today than when I was a teen.

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  2. Beautiful and important post Lauren xo

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  3. Love this! Self care and love is so important. Thanks for sharing!

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  4. I was just talking to my son about trusting his gut earlier today. We all need to listen to that little inner voice more often!

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  5. I love this post! I agree that it's important to be kind to yourself. We are way to hard on ourselves these days, and that can be really dibilitating.

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  6. Definitely a great exercise to do...look in the mirror and tell yourself "I love you."

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  7. This is such great information. I am actually going to share it with my teen daughter and make it into a discussion topic with her. Its so important to teach them while they are young to be love themselves and be their own best friend

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  8. Great advice! Becoming your own best friend is important to ensure that you're treated right. :)

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  9. I love this advice! I believe you can never be truly happy unless you love yourself.

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  10. I love this topic because sometimes we tend to ignore self-care. Great advice.

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  11. This is great! I always try to be kind to myself and have self-care so I don't go nuts.

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  12. I have been my own best friend for quite some time. Self-love is so important, and I've truly grown to love who I am as a person.

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  13. Such an inspiring blog post. I've been embracing self love a lot more recently and it's helped my confidence so much. What a great topic to cover on your blog.

    Jackie | fashionxfairytale |

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  14. This is a nice read. And yes, I definitely agree on our instinct. Trust that voice within yourself when making some decisions.

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  15. This is very inspiring and I have to say this is something new! I have thought of self love and was never taught it but I will definitely do it every morning!

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  16. This post couldn't have come at a better time. I am so harsh on myself but what I need to remember is that I am far better than I think. It is a hard journey but one I am willing to take x

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  17. I know that you have to be able to love yourself. I don't always trust my intuition but I think you are right that I need to be able to trust it more. Also I need to think before acting.

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  18. I'm a shy type introvert. I'm cool with it. I like to keep my personal space really spacious. :)

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  19. Not can bring you peace and happiness but yourself. Stay positive, live positive :)..

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  20. In all things put yourself first and what is meant to be will follow.

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  21. Loving ourselves is so important, it's the base of all... healty life and happiness!

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  22. Learning even to like myself was a tough lesson to learn. I have personally spent the last seven years since my divorce learning it was ok to be myself and to love who I am. Great Blog Lauren!

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  23. I love this! We surely our the harshest critics of ourselves and I work daily to become more confident and self-loving!

    xoxo, SS

    www.southernandstyle.com

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  24. This is very well said. WE must learn to love ourselves and give ourselves the respect that we need. These are very nice ways to become your own best friend.

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