End of 2018 Thoughts....

Happy December 31st! The official last day of 2018! A few days ago, I sat at the computer and felt compelled to just write whatever came to mind. Here's the result....

The past year, I've acknowledged my growth.  I've devoted considerable time to self-care and self-love. As I reflect upon my year, I am becoming emotional, realizing  how far my journey has taken me.. My motto for 2017 was, "I am enough!" I haven't just come to believe it, I've embodied it! I wouldn't say I suffered from low self-esteem, but I'm definitely more confident in the person I am today. One reason for that, is I am allowing myself to love me, as I am... whether I am happy and content or sad and feeling broken. Wherever I am, is okay...I don't need to have all the answers; I don't have to be fearful of making mistakes. I let life flow. I am guided by G-d's spirit; I will be where I am intended to be.

Most of my life, I felt pressured to be perfect. I knew I wasn't; still to me, it seemed everyone else expected that of me. I felt that I was placed on a pedestal. I was also chastised for being "too good" and that in turn made others “feel badly about themselves.” Being extremely sensitive, this would upset me. I couldn't change who I was.

Excerpt from Light is the New Black By Rebecca Campbell

What was I to do? I've always felt different. I don’t sweat the small stuff. I find most people are focusing on things that seem so trivial. I'm not being judgmental; it’s just hard for me to relate. Instead of small talk, I prefer to jump right into a conversation, discussing philosophy or talking about ancient civilizations. I want to learn about a person's core beliefs and what they’re truly passionate about. As I've gotten older, I've learned that this is because I am an old soul. Ask me how old I am, and sometimes, I'll pause; twenty-three years of age, doesn't always come to mind. I have an inexplicable sense of wisdom. I was also blessed with a selfless paternal grandmother; she is no longer on this earth with me; but, I know, she is my guardian angel. I have her eternal love and strength of character pulsing through my veins; I believe that may be the reason that I am as empathetic as I am.

My life experiences, both good and bad, have placed me in this exact moment in time. I've been guided on my current path and I couldn't be more grateful. I like to say, "I turn my pain into purpose" and strive to live my life, with honesty and integrity. I write blogs like these to share my inner thoughts, and to share the journey of my personal growth in hopes of connecting with my readers and inspiring them.

I have reached a juncture in my life where I feel whole. I've done the work and discovered the source of many of my insecurities. Last week, while talking with a dear friend, I answered my own question: “What is preventing me from creating magnificent things for myself?” I begin the creative process but stop myself from attaining far greater successes. What would happen if I just allowed myself to put my creations out there? I often nurture others and their dreams, putting their needs before my own. What if I poured the same amount of time and love into myself? I'm ready to begin a new chapter in my life. I don't know what 2019 has in store for me....but I know it's going to be amazing.

I want to be a voice for those with invisible illnesses, to let them know they aren't alone. I want to stand up for the ones who identify differently from the "norm." What makes the world so great is our diversity. I want to continue to be the light that leads others from the darkness. My calling is to help others, even if it is merely by being available to them and listening. I have tried to fit into a preconceived idea, to make sense of “what I want to do with my life." If I am honest with myself, I have a sense of why I am here...and what I am meant to do. I wasn't put on this earth to fill a void. It is my purpose to create something unique, something unlike anything that has been created before. 

I don't require a nine-to-five job or a standardized education. Those are the opinions of others. I am not one to align with societal norms or expectations. I am meant to be an innovator. My intuition is guided by our Creator. It is time to truly heed the call. One of my greatest discoveries of 2018 is my own voice. I need not be afraid to stand up for what I truly believe. Will fear appear along the way? Most certainly it will! But staying true to one’s self is when miracles will begin to take shape!

I'd love to hear what you are most looking forward to in the coming year. Also, what is something you will commit to?

I commit to living in the moment as much as possible and to create new things, with pure love and joy!

2018 Love and Gratitude

As the year is coming to a close, I want to make a post thanking some people who have really made a difference in my life. Those that have truly touched my heart during this year.

Donna :

Meeting you, was definitely a highlight, of my year. From the moment we met, it seemed, we had known each other, all of our lives. This lovely woman, is my twin. We enjoy nearly all of the same things; from having the same favorite movie, (one from Old Hollywood), to eating creamsicles, late at night. We share the same sense of humor, and seriously need to entertain the idea of doing a podcast together. I'm not sure the world is ready for us : P

Janae :

Us meeting was divine intervention. The limited time we spent together, this past winter, was extremely meaningful to me. This woman is a literal angel...the sweetest soul you'll ever meet, with the purest heart. It's virtually impossible to be sad in Janae's presence; she's a ray of sunshine. I saw her in LA, in October, and had tears of happiness rolling down my face. I thank G-d, you have been brought into my life, and look forward to our future adventures together.

Patricia :

My sweet doll, Patricia...We met five years ago. Where does the time go? I'll never forget the outpouring of love you showed me. Patricia and I met at a business and networking conference. Near the end of the week, she approached me, took my hands into hers, and we shared the most beautiful conversation...about my value in this world and the mark I would make. We've kept in contact over the years, but this year, we reconnected; it's meant so much to me. Patricia and Scot, her husband, are truly family. I'm grateful for their love and constant prayers.

Nathalie :

We all need a friend that is the voice of reason...that's my Nats! We met at a spiritual convergence, a year ago, and have remained close. She's the voice I hear, when I start to second guess myself. She frequently will call and send me sweet texts, letting me know, she's thinking about me. Nathalie is such a beautiful, creative soul; she truly enriches my life. 

Gina :

Gina, my love! We have been "friends" for a couple of years, but got really close this year. We instantly hit it off and our souls just knew one another. Our goals and paths are very similar and I just feel so much love and gratitude for this girl! It was no coincidence that we came into each others lives and I know that we're in it together, for the long haul...We're going to change the world, girlie!

Tehrah :

My "Momma T" has been my biggest blessing of 2018; I'm unable to formulate the proper words. Both of us, have been on quite the journey, the past few years. During the past year, we have shared and experienced so much. I'm truly blessed to have had her by my side. Tehrah has imparted wisdom, from her life experiences, supported me in my personal growth, and shown me an abundance of love... sometimes tough love... but I know, she always has my best interest at heart. 

Many of my newer friendships, stem from other beautiful people, in my life. I am truly grateful to have so many wonderful friends. The year 2018, has brought me a few new angels, and has solidified many of my existing relationships. So, a thank you to all of my other lovely friends. I love you! <3 

What are three things you are grateful for? P.S. Stay tuned for my first giveaway!

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista

Love Is The Answer

The purest, sweetest love I've ever felt was from my Grandma Rose. She was my paternal grandmother and passed away before I turned eight. Growing up as an only child and having divorced parents, she was my favorite person. The major influence in my life. She taught me to tie my shoes, we watched Golden Girls together, drew pictures, etc. She passed away suddenly from an awful disease, Flesh-Eating Bacteria. I remember understanding she was gone. I didn't cry and at her funeral, my dad lifted me up to see her in the casket. I put a poem I had written for her in there and kissed her cheek. Her face was cold and I told him she wasn't in there any more. Her soul had departed. As the years went by, I knew she was my guardian angel and always in my heart, but it got harder and harder to remember her. 

Being the intuitive person I am, I can connect to beings that have left us. I can feel the presence of those who are gone, but I could never connect with my grandmother. It's now been over 15 years since my grandma died and I strive to be half the woman she was. She had a heart of gold and there was no one quite like her.

Recently, I was spending time with a dear friend and I found myself getting emotional. It took me a few days to realize why this was. I found myself having bursts of tears...happy ones. I felt an overwhelming amount of love. There are all kinds of love. I've given love and received it, but it's truly rare to feel something so pure and unconditional. When I try to remember my grandma, I realize that the memories really are fading as time goes on. That's just part of life. I still feel the love I have for her and she had for me. I realized I was so emotional because for the first time in 15 years, I felt that love again, from my friend. I feel so blessed to first of all had my grandma in my life, but to feel the same kind of love again. 

It reminds me that this kind of love is out there and of the good that exists within all of us. Sometimes, we don't show it or see it in others, but it's there. 

As the song goes, love is the answer....Always come from a place of love. 

Have a beautiful week filled with lots of love and blessings!

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista

Yom Kippur Resolutions 5779/2018

Today, is Yom Kippur, a Jewish holiday, which is known as the day of atonement. It is the holiest day of the year, a time to reflect. For me, it's about much more than just apologizing for our actions and promising to do our best to change our ways, but it's a spiritual cleansing. 

I've had quite the year...and there is nothing I would change from it, because it's all led me to exactly where I am right now. Sure, there were some messy moments, but I took something from each interaction and experience. 

I am choosing to let go of what does not serve me any longer. We are all on different life paths. What holds true for us today, may no longer tomorrow. What is right for us, may not be for someone else. We are constantly evolving and that is OK. As I move forward and into this new year, I wrote a list of resolutions; goals for the person I'd like to become. 

Here are some of my resolutions for the year 5779...

• Speak up - For so long, I thought it was better to keep quiet. If someone upset me, it was better to let it be...I wanted to avoid conflict. This year I have spoken my truth and used my voice. It's empowering. It also has made others close to me uncomfortable, and that has been hard, but I know that everyone in our life is there to serve a purpose. Sometimes, when we start vibrating at a higher frequency, it no longer matches the energy of people around us. It's up to us to recognize that and let go. And in some instances people just fade away.

• To surround myself with people who bring out the best in me (and vice versa) - One of my mantras is the quote, "Energy flows where attention goes." I've noticed myself at times falling into patterns of gossip, depending on the people around me. I really want to be more conscious of the energy in my space and what I am focusing on. 

• Connect more to G-d and source - I feel so much more balanced when I listen to my intuition and connect to both my higher self and my faith. 

• Tap into my creative side - I'm excited to be delving back into studying fashion. And want to take some drawing classes. 

• Blog more frequently - I want to create more content. I have a lot of ideas and feel inspired to post on a variety of topics.

In the coming year, I strive to be the best I can be, love myself unconditionally, and always count my blessings...I have so much to be grateful for.

I pray for peace, understanding and lots of love for one another, as we move forward...

Gmar Chatimah Tova! May you be inscribed in the book of life. ️

We have 105 days left until 2019 - What is something you'd like to accomplish?

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista

Welcome To New York - My Summer Adventure

For as long as I can remember, I've wanted to travel to New York. If you look back on some of my posts, it was always mentioned as a place I wanted to visit. I finally made it happen this summer. I planned a birthday trip for both my mom and me!

It all started when I was scrolling on my Instagram and noticed that Luann De Lesseps had added more dates for her cabaret show. I have to admit, a guilty pleasure of mine is The Real Housewives of New York. I've been watching since it premiered, when I was 12 and have been hooked ever since. I came up with a plan; where we'd stay, found reasonably priced airline tickets, etc and pitched the idea to my mom and voila! We were going!

I thought I'd share with you some of the highlights of the trip! Of course, I took lots of pictures of my food. :P

On the plane....ready for takeoff!

 We landed bright and early - before 8 AM!

I found us an Airbnb that was located close to Times Square. We walked around and stumbled upon this little restaurant called Sliced. Breakfast sounded great and the prices were super reasonable. They're known for their open faced sandwiches. We figured the food would be just ok, but it was super tasty. Great portions as well. We ordered their egg salad small toast and their red quinoa salad. The food was made quickly and very fresh. They also threw in a little dessert. 

Having studied fashion, I wanted to check out Fashion Institute of Technology's museum. 

Currently, they have an exhibit called, Fashion Unraveled. 

 There was a lot of art that I passed by on the street. I really loved this piece.

I had to check out Diane Von Furstenburg's flagship store!

I went to Chelsea to see Mary Boone's Gallery. We also explored the Chelsea Market....So cool! It has a giant food hall and many unique shops.

For dinner, we went to Beauty and Essex. When the one in LA had first opened up, I really wanted to go. It didn't end up working out because of how long the waits were. I was excited to go to the one in NYC. If you go, make sure to check out the bathroom. :P

We took a walk at night to see what Times Square looked like all lit up. It's just like in the movies....It's truly the city that never sleeps. 

Whenever I travel, I love to check out the vegan spots. Eat by Chloe is my fave! I am constantly craving their mac and cheese. It's made with cashews and sweet potato and it is topped off with a shitake bacon. I love everything I have eaten here. They have locations in other major cities such as LA, Boston and Providence and are even in London. By Chloe is 100% vegan and plant-based and offers salads, burgers, pasta, breakfast options, fresh juices and a variety of baked goods and the most delicious ice cream.

Writing that paragraph just made me want their food soooo badly!

Of course, I was looking forward to Countess Luann's show, but what made it even more exciting to me was the fact that it was being held at 54 Below. It's literally located in the basement of the former Studio 54. I loveeeee me some Studio 54!

The next day, we went to brunch at a place I found on Yelp. It's a cozy little spot known for seafood. They have "hidden bathrooms" with bookshelves as doors which I thought was neat and the rest of the décor is kind of nautical. The place has an elegant, but casual vibe and the staff were super friendly. We ordered the Eggs Scandinavia (An eggs benedict with smoked salmon) and their chocolate chip pancakes. 

My mom's pick was for us to do a Radio City Music Hall tour. It was pretty cool...Learned a lot of historical facts. 

 Walking through Times Square 

 That night we had tickets to see Bernadette Peters in Hello Dolly. Before the show, we went to Katz Delicatessen. OMG! It was heaven. The portions were huge and we had to scarf down our food so that we could get to Broadway in time. It was delicious...Just being there was a cool experience!

The show was incredible!! I can't believe I had the pleasure of seeing Bernadette Peters perform!!

My cousin Niesha lives near the city, and wanted to take us around town for the day. Her wonderful friend Dan came too and we had such a fun time! 

One of my favorite restaurants in Las Vegas used to be Max Brenner. They closed that location, and so we went to one in NYC. YUM! 

They took us to Greenwich Village, which had a vibe I totally liked. 

Dan insisted that if we liked Middle Eastern food, this was the place to go. It's legit! They've been around for over 45 years. Authentic, family owned, small hole in the wall kind of place. 

 Local bookstores make my heart happy!

 We took a stroll through Central Park at sunset.

Even though I don't eat cheese, I really wanted to have that NYC pizza experience...so we found this place called NY Pizza Suprema. They've been in business for over 50 years and had some vegan/vegetarian choices. 

We were only there for five days, but got to see a lot. Until next time, New York City...

Have you been to NYC before? What was your favorite part?

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista