Yom Kippur 5784/2023

Today is Yom Kippur, my favorite holiday, which is known as the day of atonement. I like to look at today as not only a time to make amends to those we may have hurt, but to also look inward and begin a new chapter with ourselves. I choose to let go of what is no longer serving me, set goals for the person I strive to be in this upcoming new year and to begin to create new neural pathways (new patterns).

As it has become a tradition…here are some life lessons from the past year.

“Life is happening now. Enjoy the present.”

If there’s one thing we can count on, it’s change. A motto of mine since I was barely a teenager, is that the one constant in life is change. So many of us, are waiting…to go to the beach when we lose ten more pounds. Waiting to travel until we are done with college or until the kids are grown. Waiting for life to happen.

The right and perfect moment may never come.

Often, we are not present in our daily lives, because we are worrying about our future or preoccupied with thoughts of our past.

It’s time to follow our heart, chase our goals, and make the best of what we have. Get rid of ‘what isn’t’ and move towards ‘what can be’.  And remember that happiness is made up of a collection of small moments.

“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”

We have a choice in how we respond in any situation.  We can’t control the words that come out of another person’s mouth, but we can control our reaction. There’s that survival instinct, that when our brains sense danger, get triggered, and we automatically go into fight or flight mode. But we can choose to respond instead of react. Think before we act. A quote by Viktor E. Frankl, that is fitting for this life lesson is: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

“There is no glory in a grind that literally grinds you down to dust.”

Our society pushes a fast pace life. It can overstimulate and exhaust us. When we complete one task, there’s another one to begin. As we race against the clock, we reach our destination quicker, but lose the experience of the journey itself.  We praise people who keep pushing and pushing themselves, even when it can be to their own detriment. The hardest thing about prioritizing self care, is not feeling guilty about it. It’s ok to slow down….to set boundaries with others, but also with ourselves.

Here are my goals for the year 5784:

Make time for self-care

Learn something new as often as possible

Work towards moving 10,000 steps a day

Try and read ten books this year

Connect more to my faith and G-d

In the coming year, I strive to be the best I can be, love myself unconditionally, and always count my blessings.

I pray for peace, understanding and lots of love for one another, as we move forward…

Gmar Chatimah Tova! May you be inscribed in the book of life!

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

 

XOXOTheZenFashionista

 

Yom Kippur Resolutions 5783/2022

It’s officially Yom Kippur, the day of atonement. It’s a day of cleansing and renewal. As we make amends to those we may have hurt, we also look to the lessons we have learned in the past year. 

Here are some of the lessons I have learned:

“Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Talk about your joys.” - Rita Schiano

It’s great to have a best friend and confidant to talk to. It’s important to not hold everything in and to have an outlet. We need validation as human beings and there’s nothing wrong with that.  But sometimes, we talk about our problems and vent to a point where they take more power over us than we realize. There has to be a healthy balance.  

I don’t like to dwell on situations. I give myself time to feel how I’m feeling, and sometimes I’ll talk with a friend or journal, and I find that very therapeutic. I then find that it’s good to delve into a hobby and to shift my focus.

“The deepest well can also be drained.” - Swedish Proverbs

The more you take care of yourself, the better you take care of others. 

It’s imperative to fill your own cup. We must replenish and make ourselves a priority. 

I know that I’m a natural born nurturer. I love to be of service to others but need to work towards better self-care for myself. Little things such as, listening to music, drinking my daily bone broth, spending time in the sun etc. 

“You cannot control how people respond to your energy. At the end of the day, we are not people's ideas of us. That is a perception. How people react to you is a projection. Protect your energy.” - TheZenFashionista

How others react to us, is often not about us at all. People see one another through a filtered lens; through their own individual experiences and perspectives. While we have no control over that, we do have control over our own feelings and reactions. 

In situations where I sense myself starting to respond to negativity, I take a step back and center myself. I remember this reflection does not have to do with me and take a deep breath. 

As usual, I’ve written a list of my resolutions, but I’ve also written a gratitude list. 

I am grateful for…

• My love of learning

• The abundance of sweet friends and loved ones in my life

• The leaves changing colors in the fall

• The power of music and its ability to transcend time

• Making fresh, nourishing juice 

• Walks in nature 

• A good night’s sleep

• Being able to say no

• Shopping on Amazon 

• Clean water 

My resolutions:

To read more - 

I was the child who always had her nose in a book. I would easily read 200 pages a day. Reading expands your vocabulary, improves memory, reduces stress and best of all can transport you to another world. I really want to make it my goal to read 12 books in the next year.  Recommendations welcome!

Write/Blog on a more frequent basis -

As I’m writing this post, I feel inspired to make more of an effort to connect on here. I have a lot of content I’d like to share on TheZenFashionista. 

Stick to a regular self-care routine -

I want to create a more intentional daily self-care routine. I can get into a good rhythm of cleansing my skin, flossing my teeth, taking my vitamins etc., but sometimes I will have an off day and it seems to throw me off track. I need to remind myself that there may be a lapse in my routine and that it is ok. I can always adjust and begin again tomorrow. 

Connect more to G-d and my faith and my spirituality-

With the hustle and bustle of our daily life, we can easily feel off balance and disconnected. I tend to ground myself through a number of different ways; tuning into a religious service, which I can stream from my couch, meditation with high frequency sounds, cleansing my space with sage crystals, listening to spiritual/religious music, etc.

There are 108 days left of 2022...What is something you hope to accomplish?

In this coming year I strive to love and honor myself and remain grateful and count my blessings. 

I pray for peace, understanding and lots of love for one another, as we move forward...

Gmar Chatimah Tova! May you be inscribed in the book of life. 

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista

Yom Kippur Resolutions 5782/2021

Yom Kippur Resolutions 5782/2021

It’s been a long time since I’ve written a post, but it’s officially Yom Kippur, the day of atonement. It’s a day of cleansing and renewal.

On this day, I make amends to those I may have hurt and set goals to continue on the path to who I strive to become.

I utilize my experiences during the year to learn and grow and to move forward.

It’s tradition for me to write something meaningful, but instead of my list of resolutions, I’ve also decided to write some life lessons I’ve learned over the past year.

I have been inspired by many people; many that I have met on my journey through life, and others that I have encountered through their writings.

Life Lessons:

"You’re the only person that can determine your self worth"

It’s easy to get sucked into the emotions of our loved ones. Others' actions generally have little to do with us. As human beings, we see things through a “me” lens (meaning that we see everything through our own eyes...it's our own perception). We take things personally that really are a reflection of the other person's own inner feelings and often pain.

No matter what, you are worthy of love and respect. And at the end of the day, the story you portray about your life is everything. 

"What we resists persists"

If energy flows where attention goes, then what we resist will persist. We are wildly powerful just by what we create with our thoughts and emotions. With all the turmoil and state of our world right now, I choose to focus on positive contributions to conversations and to bring joy into my day. Spending my time talking about what makes me unhappy or bashing others beliefs is counterproductive. It seems a lot of people spend their energy fighting against something they don’t like, when they could be supporting what they want to change. I choose to keep my faith and do my best to come from a place of love.

WORDS are powerful.

"You can’t take back things you’ve said"

I’m a very sensitive individual and even if I know someone might not have meant something they said, the words may still stick with me. I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I’m not trying to please everyone and I don’t need people to like me, but I admit sometimes people’s hurtful words can affect me. Similarly to what I said earlier about other’s actions; when people in our life use words against us, they are most likely projecting a belief or fear that they have about themselves. What I’ve begun to teach myself is that words are just words, without a thought put behind them. I center myself and set personal boundaries and let it go.

"I can do nothing for you but work on myself. You can do nothing for me but work on yourself"

Two of the truest statements I know are that change is the one constant in life and that the one thing each one of us can control is ourselves and the way we choose to react to situations. They tell you that you can’t begin to save someone else until you save yourself.

One of the most important things we can do is to shift our own mindset and let go of our biases. We can’t change another person, only our reactions.

"Burnout is not a badge of honor"

We live in a such a fast paced society, that sometimes we forget to breathe. It’s become the norm to feel stressed and even when we are done with the tasks at hand, we find a way to keep the rest of our plate full.

We praise people who keep pushing themselves even when they shouldn’t. We don’t know how to just relax. The hardest thing about prioritizing self care, is to not feel guilty about it. Throughout the day, I have begun to check in with myself and listen to my body's intuition more. I give myself permission to relax and slow down, even when it feels "unproductive."

“Standing still is the fastest way of moving backwards in a rapidly changing world”

We live in an ever changing world. If you don’t adapt to the change, you’ll be left behind. If we look at things of the past, such as MySpace and Blockbuster; they didn’t move forward fast enough and other companies came out of nowhere.

The natural direction of life is downwards—towards disorder.

Nothing stays the same. Whether it be our bodies, relationships, business etc.

We have to constantly be working on these things. Constantly growing and nurturing our relationships, learning new skills and expanding our minds, getting out of comfort zone and moving forward. I have always been one to accept change and find the opportunity to grow and learn. Change is a new beginning; it's the start of a new chapter. 

Resolutions for the year 5782:

Stop saying sorry-

Three years ago I wrote a blog post, and in it I expressed my healing of always feeling the need to apologize. Well, that trigger has crept back upon me and so I’m lovingly working to retrain my neural pathways.

Travel -

The past couple years have not included very much travel. My soul craves new adventures. I feel stuck when I’m in one place for too long, but I’ve learned to be content where I’m at. With that said, I’d like to begin traveling again.

Clear out the clutter - 

It's that time again. Each year, I like to reevaluate my personal belongings; whether it be clothes, papers, etc. I always feel so much better once I do a mini purge.

Connect more to my faith and G-d -

With all the chaos around, I feel balanced when I listen to my intuition and connect to both my higher self and my faith. 

Journal More-

Writing is sense of healthy catharsis. I'd like to do more of it this year.  

In the coming year, I pray for peace, understanding and lots of love for one another, as we all navigate these trying times together.

Gmar Chatimah Tova! May you be inscribed in the book of life.

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com


To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista

Yom Kippur Resolutions 5781/2020

Today is Yom Kippur, also known as the day of atonement. It is said that it is the holiest day of the year. 

It’s a day of cleansing and renewal. A day to reflect on the past year. It’s healing and empowering. What has transpired in the past is now behind us. 

I make amends to those I may have hurt and also set goals to continue on the path to who I strive to become. I look at Yom Kippur and the New Year as a spiritual experience, that I not only set goals for, but also focus on my intentions. 

I utilize my experiences during the year to learn and grow and to move forward. 

Here are some of my resolutions for the year 5781:

• Listen to my own needs and take care of ME. My nature is to be a nurturer, and take care of others, but in order to do that, I have to remember to take care of myself. 

• Read/Learn - I crave knowledge and love choosing a topic and delving in...whether it be different civilizations and cultures, religious beliefs, history of inspirational leaders, etc. 

• Get creative and write more blogs 

• Stay in the present moment and be aware of my emotions - It’s easy to take on the energy of people around me. I want to do my best to regroup and rise above it - not react. 

• Connect more to my faith and G-d - More so than ever, feeling connected and having hope is a necessity. With all the chaos around, I feel balanced when I listen to my intuition and connect to both my higher self and my faith. 

Let us remember that we are each on a different path in life. What holds true for us today, may no longer tomorrow. We are constantly changing and evolving and that is one of the beautiful parts of life.  

In the coming year, I strive to connect more with G-d and to remember to always count my blessings.  

I pray for peace, understanding and lots of love for one another, as we all navigate these trying times together. 

Gmar Chatimah Tova! May you be inscribed in the book of life. 

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista

2020...I Can See Clearly Now

As we embark on a new decade, I wanted to take a minute to reflect on 2019. I’ve had a great deal of loss. Three very important people in my life passed away. 

My dear friend Diane, who was such a light to this world. She had a huge heart and love for humanity. She believed in me with every fiber of her being and always reminded me of my value to society and the impact  that I came here to make. 

My sweet Karebear who I met on a chronic pain support group, online when I was eleven years old. She and I were there for each other in the middle of the night when we couldn’t sleep, due to pain. We’d send music back and forth and pictures of our dogs. I’ll always keep her in my heart. 

  

And then there’s Kinks/Gramps. I can’t honestly process this one yet and it’s been four months. His death was so sudden and reminds me how blessed we are for the present moment. To stay grounded and to hug those you love and to tell them often. You never know what tomorrow will bring. 

  

I’m so grateful to have had these three individuals in my life. They each helped shape me into the person I am today and I know they’re with me in my heart always, and up above, watching over me.  

There wasn’t just loss and sadness in 2019, but new friendships formed and bonds grew stronger. Shout out to, Brandi who I love so so much. We got super close this year and I can’t wait to see what 2020 has in store for us. 

It also marked a decade of friendship with Ashley. Are we really this old? I’m lucky to have you in my life and you deserve all the happiness in the world. 

I got to travel to LA and Vegas and be a part of the Chinese Oscars and an award show at the Hard Rock.  

                                  

I got to have lunch with my beautiful friend and role model Susan.  

Worked Paleo FX in Austin and one of my best friends, Gina flew in, to do it with me. 

I spent the majority of the year with my Momma Tehrah, and I’m blessed for the laughter and music that she brings to my life. Also the fur babies. That’s pure love and happiness right there. 

I also took a fun birthday trip with my mom, to explore parts of Michigan I had not yet seen. 

 

I decided to get back into the drivers seat in regards to my health and be the best advocate I could be for myself and find the answers I so deserve.  

I spent 2017, working on “being enough.” 2018 was about “finding my voice” and setting boundaries.  This year was all about “truly loving myself.” I learned that I can do anything I set my mind to. Skills I never imagined having in my toolbox, are now accessible.  I also learned that I may not always get closure in the way I think I deserve. That I need to be able to accept it and move on. 

In 2020, I want to continue exploring and learning. 

To accept that sometimes we outgrow people and experiences, but to enjoy the journey that is life. Each event on our path, leads us to the next...

I want to focus on self-care and listen to what my inner child needs. I want to learn how to be there for others and be the nurturer that I am, while still taking care of my well-being.  

I want to stay as present as possible and to be conscious of my words and the power they have. To surround myself with people who bring out the best in me (and vice versa).  To continue to hold myself accountable for my actions, but also to those around me. I deserve to be respected and my value.  

In 2017, I wanted to create a memory jar. I’d like to attempt this again. The idea is to place a note in a jar each day. It could be about a new experience, an accomplishment, a note of gratitude, etc. I may choose to journal this. My intention is to write something, every day.  

I commit to staying true to who I am. I am not here to be like anyone else. I surrender my pain of this year and the past to G-D. I forgive and let go of anything that does not serve me and is not in the highest good. Miracles take shape when we stand back and truly look around us. We are guided by source, if we allow it to come through.  

And so it is!

I am ready for you, 2020! 

Have you reflected on your year? What’s something you accomplished? How did you grow as a person? What are your intentions and resolutions for the new year?

As always, if you have any questions, leave a comment below or feel free to email me at TheZenFashionista@Gmail.Com 

To subscribe to my blog, you can click the subscribe tab at the top of this page, comment, or give it to me personally. I really appreciate it!

Until next time,

XOXOTheZenFashionista