I was reading a post I made earlier in the year, (click here to read it) and it really resonated with how I was feeling in this moment. This year has taught me a lot of things about myself, boundaries, relationships, etc.
I spent a good portion of this year traveling and discovering. I learned how to have adventures and sightsee by myself. There's still such a stigma with sitting in a restaurant alone and I've come to find, it's actually quite nice. It gives you a chance to observe what is going on around you, mindfully eat, get in tune with your body, etc.
I accepted that in the past I had allowed others to drain my energy and I put these people before me and my well-being. That had to change. I couldn't grow as I needed to if I continued allowing this to go on.
I spent a lot of time on boundaries, which is something I've struggled with for a long time. How to make them stick.
An emotion easy for me to feel is sadness, but rarely anger. Growing up anger was something I witnessed and it was not something I seemed to ever emote. I met a lovely woman this year that taught me how to feel the emotion. She taught me not to be scared of it, and the process we went through was quite healing.
I'm proud of myself and love myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and reconnecting with my intuition.
With all that said, we have less than two weeks of 2017 left. It’s a time to reflect, make resolutions, get stuff done, go, go, go...That’s usually me. But - not this year!
I just want to sleep, sit in silence, watch YouTube videos on spirituality and movies from the 1950s, listen to music, drink smoothies, and spontaneously decide to do things, instead of planning ahead.
My head has been spinning the past few days. I’ve felt overwhelmed. As I’ve been feeling all of this, and acknowledging its presence, I’ve been in a state of grounding myself.
I have a long list of things I could be doing, “should” be doing, but something I’ve really been working on for the remainder of this year is putting myself first. Listening to what my body and soul need from me. I’m learning to say no. To respect myself enough to validate my own feelings.
I’m surrendering. I’m in a state of being. Going from moment to moment. And you know what? That’s perfectly ok.
I am a being full of love and light. And as this year comes to a close, I’m going to honor all that I am, all that I’ve been, and all that I’m becoming.
My mantra this year was that I am enough. And I truly feel that way. I AM ENOUGH!
Thank you to everyone who has helped shape my year and been a part of my journey thus far.
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